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Tangled Threads and Cultural Beliefs that Damage the Quilt of Humanity
Part of the process of repairing the quilt of humanity involves mending the damage caused by such things as racism, sexism, heterosexism and classism, to name just a few. To be effective in this mending process, we need to recognize that the threads of races, gender, sexual orientation, and class in particular are tangled up together in such a way that they can only be untangled and repaired together. In her book, where we stand: Class Matters,bell hooks speaks directly about this:
“To challenge racism or sexism without linking [my italics] these systems to economic structures of exploitation and our collective participation in the upholding and maintenance of such structures, however marginal that engagement may be, is ultimately to betray a vision of justice for all.” (p. 161)
Everything’s Connected
Table of contents for Change, Transition and Transformation
Part 7 in the Change, Transition, and Transformation Series
When my neck was in pain, I knew that my muscles had tightened up and locked into place. According to Dr. Lou, my chiropractor, the massage had not been effective because my muscles were not the source of misalignment. Rather, the muscles had tightened up in response to the misalignment of my vertebrae.
I continued to see Dr. Lou so he could make adjustments to realign my spine. But, in between visits, my back would become misaligned again and the pain would return. Interestingly, the muscles were so used to being in a tightened, resistance mode, they would fall back into the familiar role by force of habit, pulling my spine out of alignment in the process. The muscles, rather than supporting the adjustments, were working against them.
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Balance, Alignment, and Support
Table of contents for Change, Transition and Transformation
Part 9 in the Change, Transition, and Transformation Series
As James Baldwin stated:
“Any real change implies the breakup of the world as one has always known it, the loss of all that gave one an identity, the end of safety.” As we undergo change, even desired change, we do temporarily lose ourselves – we lose the identity that we knew and that was familiar to us. As a result, we end up feeling unsafe, uncertain, and off balance.
As is clear from my earlier posts, being able to move through change and transition and successfully come out transformed on the other side is about balance and alignment. Read more
Change, Transition, and Transformation for Executive Directors
Over the last few months, I have been facilitating a monthly Learning and Support Group for executive directors of New York City nonprofit organizations with the support of the Nonprofit Coordinating Committee of New York.
I developed this series after having conducted a few roundtable discussion meetings with these organizational leaders. What became apparent during these discussions was their difficulty finding time to step back and reflect on their work, their roles, their visions for their organizations and their professional and personal development that is crucial to their ongoing success and effectiveness. Read more
Stories About Ourselves and Stories About Others
I had an experience recently in a long-term learning group that I was in. All the participants had made a commitment to attend six 3-day sessions over an 18-month period of time.
Difficult Conversations
Many of my coaching conversations center around “difficult conversations.” These are the conversations that my clients least want to have – and, paradoxically, most need to have. Read more
Story Telling: A Space for Race
Recently, I did a book reading at Brownstone Books in Brooklyn, NY of my book, Repairing the Quilt of Humanity: A Metaphor for Healing and Reparation. The book uses Read more
The Power of One Person’s Authentic Presence: Barack Obama
Barack Obama’s campaign for president is a example of how one person’s authentic presence can change the world. Obama’s way of being in the world is in stark contrast to that of George Bush. Ever since 9-11, George Bush has played on people’s fears as a way to increase his power and control. Fear, while an effective mechanism for control, does not bring about positive change. Rather, it leaves people paralyzed and/or apathetic. Read more
The Power of Stories to Build Connections and Create Change
In the book, The Lemon Tree: An Arab, A Jew, and the Heart of the Middle East, Sandy Tolan artfully tells the story of two individuals who grew up with dramatically different cultural “stories.”
Bashir Khairi, a Palestinian man, was six years old in 1948, when his family was expelled from the home his father built by Jewish Zionists trying to create a “national the Jewish people.” When the Israeli soldiers approached al-Ramla, the Khairi family’s village, the Arab civilian defenders were no match for the Israeli army. Read more
Alice Walker’s Powerful Story
Last month, Alice Walker published an open letter, Lest We Forget: An Open Letter to My Sisters Who Are Brave, about why she is supporting Barack Obama for president. It is a perfect example of the power of stories to influence in ways that “facts” and “logic” cannot. Stories provide the context that is crucial to understanding another’s perspective. Read more
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For information about Deb's book, The Quilt of Humanity: A Metaphor for Healing and Reparation, click here